The phone rang and it was a private number. I braced myself. Yes I knew that it could be a credit card company but it’s 2014. I’m fearless. Sadly it was worse.
It was the ex whose number I blocked back in April of 2013. I bumped into him over Christmas and he clearly saw this as an opportunity to call me. (Wait, I just realised that he made a part of my Christmas party round up) I’ve written about our short lived interaction in Dating a man child and We’re going to Ibiza. Yes, he made it into 3 blogs I was so annoyed.
Him: Hi it’s me
Me: Are you calling me from work?
Him: Yes
Me: But didn’t you think I blocked your number for a reason?
Him: You blocked my number? This has never happened to me before. I just thought your phone was always off because you’re busy with work and your personal life.
Me: And yet you still called…I’m sure you’ve been blocked before. You just didn’t realise. Wait, didn’t you ex before me block you?
Him: No, she didn’t block me. She changed her number and refused to give me her new one.
Me: Ah!
The signs were there. You see what I’m dealing with my precious?
I asked him why he was calling and he professed wanting to know how I was and that he wanted to be that positive friend in my life. He then proceeded to tell me about himself for 30 minutes whilst I looked at photos of Omari Hardwick online. It’s allowed. Today is his birthday. Happy Birthday Omari. I know you’re reading this.
I told Ex that I didn’t need another exhausting male friend that wasted my time and energy. That I didn’t trust him, he was flaky and that luckily I had more than enough positive people in my life. This wasn’t anything new.
He went quiet.
I was just about to make my escape when he told me that he didn’t want to be my friend but wanted 
another chance. That he had changed and he was a different person now. I asked how he had changed. He said that he thought about other people now. I asked him how us getting back together was thinking about me and my needs.
He went quiet.
I asked him if he was still living with his sister. He said yes and tried to tell me about his family dramas. Yes this was not going well.
Eventually I asked him what he hoped to get from this call and he said a chance to prove himself and that he wasn’t a bad person. I thanked him but made it clear that he was a bad person to me and I wasn’t in the mood for this.
Afterwards I thought about it and realised that the Universe is messing with me by offering me what I had a year ago and didn’t want. This whole Venus retrograde thing isn’t a good look and I’m just too tired to bring a trifling man child from 2013 into my #Fabulosity2014.
So in your face Universe. MY first challenge is completed. Now where is my prized FuHu? (future husband)? See Victory dance below.
© Chelsea Black 2014
You did well! I don’t know about Venus but I know you responded appropriately.