Why Black Men and Polygamy Sucks: A Relationship Disaster Waiting to Happen
Right, let’s dive into something that’s been simmering under the surface for a while—Black men and their fascination with polygamy. It’s the new Passport Bro. Men that aren’t able to make singular relationships work are not looking to get multiple women or foreign women? I’ve said why African Polygamy doesn’t work in the UK but let’s look at the real issue: Men’s insecurities. Some Black men think polygamy is the solution to all their problems, but, darling, I’m here to tell you: it sucks. And not in a good way. You think it will make you the Alpha you hear about on your crappy red pill podcasts but, alas, nope. You’re just asking for headaches.
1. The Fantasy vs. The Reality
So, what’s the appeal? You’d think it was as simple as having multiple women to cater to every whim, right? Wrong. The fantasy that polygamy somehow equals endless sexual gratification, a constant supply of home-cooked meals, and someone to stroke their ego is just that—a fantasy. Polygamy isn’t an easy ride for anyone involved, least of all the man.
The reality is juggling multiple relationships is hard work. Black men who advocate for polygamy often fail to acknowledge the sheer emotional, mental, and financial toll it takes. This isn’t a movie where everyone lives happily ever after in some mansion; it’s real life, and real life gets messy. Just say you want to cheat and leave us be, I beg.
2. Emotional Bankruptcy
Here’s the thing: if you can’t handle one relationship, what makes you think you can handle two, three, or four? Managing one woman’s emotional needs is already challenging, but adding more women into the mix? It’s like playing with fire and wondering why you’re getting burnt.
Many Black men who claim to be interested in polygamy struggle with basic communication in relationships. They dodge accountability like it’s a bullet. So how, pray tell, are you going to manage multiple women, each with their own emotional complexities and needs, when you can barely handle the first one? Polygamy isn’t about “just adding more love.” It’s about balancing all that drama—and let’s be real, that’s a skill most men don’t have.
3. The Power Struggle Problem
Let’s not pretend polygamy doesn’t come with its own brand of power dynamics. Often, these men are looking for control, plain and simple. Polygamy allows them to place themselves at the center of attention and pull all the strings. But newsflash: women in 2024 aren’t playing along with this outdated script.
Black women, especially, are not here for the foolishness. They’ve been holding things down for far too long to suddenly give up their power for a man who wants to play king of a castle that doesn’t exist. In a society where women are becoming more empowered every day, Black men wanting to control multiple partners reeks of insecurity, not strength.
4. You Can’t Afford It
Let’s be blunt—most Black men preaching about polygamy can’t afford it. It’s one thing to say you want multiple wives; it’s another thing to financially support multiple households. Rent, bills, childcare—these costs don’t magically disappear because you want more than one partner. If you’re not balling on some millionaire level, good luck keeping everything afloat.
The men out here talking about polygamy are often the same ones living paycheque to paycheque or living with their Mum. Bro, you can barely afford to take care of yourself, let alone multiple women and a squad of kids! If you’re dreaming of polygamy but can’t even cover the basics of one relationship, it’s time to wake up.
5. Ego Overload
Let’s be honest: for many men, polygamy is about ego. It’s not about culture or community—it’s about feeling like the man. It’s about having multiple women to stroke your pride. But here’s the thing: fragile egos break easily, and nothing tests a man’s ego quite like polygamy.
When one wife starts feeling neglected or another demands more attention, those ego-stroking fantasies turn into resentment and insecurity. And guess what? It’s always the man’s fault in the end because he’s the one who wanted this arrangement in the first place. You can’t ask for multiple relationships and then crumble under the weight of their expectations.
6. It Doesn’t Work for Women
Let’s not forget the women in this equation. Polygamy rarely benefits them. Most of the time, these setups are based on the idea that women exist to serve men, and in 2024, who’s signing up for that? Women, particularly Black women, are too busy breaking barriers and thriving on their own to be playing second fiddle to anyone.
Even in communities where polygamy is more accepted, it’s usually the women who end up dealing with the emotional labor, the jealousy, the power imbalance, and the frustration of competing for attention. And honestly, it’s exhausting. Why would any self-respecting woman want to take on the extra burden of sharing a man who can barely handle his own business?
The Polygamy Fail
At the end of the day, the idea of Black men pushing for polygamy is outdated and, frankly, unrealistic. It’s a setup for failure, and most importantly, it sucks for everyone involved. It’s not empowering, it’s not practical, and it’s certainly not a solution to anyone’s relationship problems.
If you can’t make one relationship work, then stop fantasizing about handling multiple. Polygamy, as these men imagine it, is nothing more than an ego trip wrapped in cultural nostalgia that doesn’t hold up in today’s world. And this is Black Men and Polygamy Sucks. Time to leave this one in the past where it belongs! Run Sis, run like the wind!!!
Check out the post on why it doesn’t work for Black Women here
© Chelsea Black ® 2024