Perfectly valid reasons to have meaningless sex

1.       Because you’re horny baby.

2.       Because it’s not good to take out all the frustrations of the world on your work colleagues

3.       Because playing with yourself that much can lead to wrist injuries.

4.       To practise things you’ve seen on the copious amounts of porn you’ve been watching

5.       Hey, he was cute!

6.       M&S lingerie sale just ended. You must show off your purchases

7.       It’s calorie burning so part of your new year’s resolutions

8.       Because in that moment when he makes you come it does means something

9.       Recession (part 1) Toys are increasingly expensive.

10.   Recession (part 2) It wasn’t KFC, Nandos or Burger King. Reward those that know.

11.   You’re bored of the baby story line in Eastenders and have 30 minutes to kill

12.   You never know he could be the one. He isn’t but, he could be

13.   The days are short the nights are longer. You need a night time based hobby

14.   You need to keep your skills up. Use it or lose it baby

15.   You’re meeting with friends and want to avoid the “You need to get out there” lecture

16.   He’s a celebrity. Well, he has a fan page on facebook. It counts.

17.   You don’t want the condoms to expire unused

18.   You just found out your ex is having sex. How dare he after only…..6 months!!

19.   You need something to moan about apart from the weather. Bad sex will do it.

20.   You are reading this list which means you know you want to. Go on. Spoil yourself!!


  1. ooops I forgot to add 21. It’s winter and body warmth has been advised by the government as a cheaper form of energy.

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