12 more reasons you’re single

So I posted 12 reasons earlier and I’ve been getting more from you guys all day so here are the next 12. No need to thank me. My pleasure:

  1. You’re waiting until you’ve lost weight – sweetie, a  12 year long diet might suggest that it’s not really working? Time to try something else.
  2. You’re waiting until your finances are sorted – Double incomes would half some of your bills after the initial dating
  3. You think you deserve a 9 when you’re a 5 in looks- Come on! Know your value.
  4. You think the person should love you for you – yes but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to make an effort. Seriously chick, beige? AGAIN!  Let’s not take natural too literally (arm pits?)
  5. God will provide. I wrote to god and he’s kind of busy with the economic recession to deal with our dating one so yes I’m sure he will but help him out by doing the administration ok?
  6. The one you want is married – s/he’s never going to leave them so move on, please and stop falling for married people.
  7. You’re too busy writing about bad dates to have good ones – hmmmm, moving swiftly on.
  8. You’re psychic / counsellor / spiritual leader says they’re coming – ask for a date and a money back guarantee
  9. You dismiss those that fuck up once –  Everyone deserves a second chance ….except liars and cheaters and those that are late. Just saying.
  10. You are a disciple of the list – this isn’t Burger King. You can’t have them your way.
  11. You’re secretly waiting for arranged marriages to come back in trend. Bless, not in this lifetimes sweetheart.
  12. You’re a BMW – A bitcher, a moaner or a whiner. Nothing is ever right for you and no one wants to put up with it.

That’s it for now but I’m sure there will be more.

© Chelsea Black

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