12 reasons why you’re single

So as you know this is one of the most annoying questions I hear. I’m single, how am I supposed to know why you are in the same predicament? sometimes it’s really evident yes but when relative strangers ask you this it becomes a tad annoying.  Best you go out and ask your “successful” friends who have managed to nab themselves a partner. But stop asking me I beg.

Alternatively my precious I’ve come up with 12 reasons why you may be single. The only one you can’t control is your age but the rest you can change so go down the list, figure out which one you fit into and then change it and leave me alone to wallow in chocolate and champagne heaven.

Toodles

© Chelsea Black

1. You’re waiting for him to find you. – men have a terrible sense of direction.
2. You’ve given up on him ever finding you – so you hide in unattractive clothes in front of the TV.
3. You’re angry / bitter / cutting – yeah you think it’s hurt but all we hear is wow, s/he’s bitter!
4. You’re living off past glories – so you used to be cute and get anyone. Get over it you’re in your 30s now. you’ll have to put some work in.
5. You’re stuck in a rut /bored – trying the same old dating strategies with the same results is a madness.
6. You never stick to anything – sign up to things but rarely log on? Then you complain it doesn’t work.
7. You’re unrealistic- celebrities you’ve never met chica? He lives in LA. come on!
8. You’re too pragmatic – I don’t need to explain this to you
9. Your standards are too high – if you’re not driving or living well don’t go looking for those that are.
10. Your standards are too low – seriously he’s seeing 2 other women and only calls you for sex.
11. You forgot to enjoy it – dating used to be fun. Remember that?
12. Age – whether or not the clock is ticking loudly some will assume it is.

Part 2 here