This evening I was on the train chatting to my school teacher commuter friend Pam about how I was being treated like a leper because I had a cold and now was being forced to work from home for a few days until I recovered. She was sympathising with me when a whole heap of new people came on complaining about Alice and how she isn’t taking Corrie serious. She thinks it’s just a flu. I was desperate to cough as these trains are dry aired but I held on bravely and made it to my station without incident or alerting them to my cold. Phew

Then, as I was walking up the hill towards home this woman pushed by and she was crying and struggling to run with her Michael Korss carry tote. At first I wasn’t sure what was going on but then she stopped and shouted to Rob. Rob was a skinny figure in the distance who promptly ignored her and walked faster. With resolve Crying Blondie who, quite frankly, looked like she hadn’t run for a number of years ran after him.

Suddenly I had a vision of her attacking Skinny Rob and causing him injury for making her cry. Not on my watch Blondie.

Grabbing my laptop I ran after them to make sure she didn’t beat him up.  Rob’s figure had the look of someone who would lose a fight in a middling level rain / windy day. There was nothing of him.

I struggled to keep up with Crying Blondie who was surprisingly fast. I think her emotions gave her momentum. Finally she catches up with him and reaches out her hand to halt him in his tracks. I pull my phone out of my jacket pocket to capture any violence for the police. What can I say? I’m equal opportunities when it comes to domestic abuse. Skinny Rob looks at her then turns away and walks on. By this time I’ve caught up with them and I’m all, what just happened with my eyes to Crying Blondie. She looks at me sadly, grabs her Kors bag off the ground and follows a silent, resolved Skinny Rob down the road.

I’m contemplating how involved I should get now that violence doesn’t seem to be on the cards and I’m just about to walk away when Crying Blondie splutters and coughs everywhere.

Nah Fam, let me just mind my own business innit? This street drama is for someone who doesn’t have a weak immune system. I don’t even offer her my spare pack of tissues. This is an exit stage left situation. I don’t want to be the first African here to die from this nonsense.

As I walked past him, I notice that he’s got a satisfied smirk on his face. This fekker is enjoying her distress. Urgh! I can’t with this one. I ALMOST wish she had given him a punch on the arm or something. Oh well, not my tea, not my soap opera.

Skinny Rob and Crying Blondie, I hope you’re well out there somewhere. Rob, stop being an emotionally manipulative dick. and Crying Blondie, I beg you learn to cover your mouth when you cough during our time of Corona.

© Chelsea Black 2020