Celebs Go Dating 2020

Celebs go dating is back and I don’t have much to say about this at all. I’m glad that they managed to scrape the bottom of the reality TV and soap barrel and come up with 6 new people I barely recognised. The only person I recognise is Dean Gaffney and even that took a minute without Well Hard the ever faithful dog by his side.

On Dean:  He’s got some lines on him! I never knew he could act so well until I saw him smoothly asking women out whilst the others pretended they weren’t under contract and strict orders from their agents to pick someone TV worthy

Real talk? I’m waiting for Alison Hammond to join as I’m interested in how they’re going to match an older black woman with curves. Purely selfish of me of course.

I’m struggling as I hear the girls (one from Love Island. The others from Made in Essex and The only way is Chelsea / Fulham) talk about the guys being fit then on the screen pops a video of th driest looking dude in the UK. I hope he’s got banter they all cry. I hope he’s got money for an uber home love once he realises this isn’t real dating. It’s all for their brand. You can tell by the amount of snogging.  

The best bit about the agency is Tom with his double entendres. Apart from that I wouldn’t tune it. I don’t have enough background on the goings on in Chelsea, Geordie land or Essex to be invested. Where are the real stars?  Bring Lee Ryan from Blue back please!

Oh and make up department. Do something about the foundation on the non white women please. You’re starting to make some of them look ashen at the sight of Locke and Dean and the one from Hollyoaks who is a dad at 21 and has a foot fetish. Sigh.

Let me go watch the final episode of Love is Blind on Netflix. See how crazy Amber and that weird dog loving Jessica are getting on over Barnette.

Oh episode 3 and I heard this song by Bunt featuring The Dip. That’s what I love; the discovery of real talent.

© Chelsea Black 2020

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