6 Types of DM pests

Types of DMers

As we are all at home there has been a recent phenomenon that has crept into our lives. Communication isnn’t all bad though and I’ve appreciated connecting with certain friends during The Rona. But, the lockdown has amplified the traffic in the DMs on both Instagram and Facebook. Whilst some of you may welcome it there are various types of DMers you need to be aware of before engaging.

1.      The spammer

I don’t want to listen to your mixed something or other. I really don’t. I don’t want to go to your event. I don’t want to read about David Ike and 5G and Bill Gates and vaccines. There’s enough of that on my wall. Please, stop spamming us with your sell.

2.      The Pass it oner

Dear God make it stop! The ones who are like, ‘Congratulations! You got the answer to a simple quadratic equation right so now you have to post this too and..’ My inbox is where these things come to die. I appreciate that many are bored but I just don’t have the time to waste other people’s energy.

3.      The Whisperer DMer

So we are all in the same group yet here you are cussing someone because they’re not bright. I get it but have the guts to cuss the idiot out publicly. These ones will watch you get slated publicly then send you a, ‘I support you sis’ message. So say something on the thread then!

4.      The Lonely Penis Dmer

Rest assured this one is just looking to get off and will annoy you eventually. He also will have optins and see who’s willing to chat to him at whatever time his boredom sets in. Chances are he lives with his wife and kids but one woman sexing is never enough for this one. Like those craving alcohol he craves the sexual ego boosts and now has to resort to getting it wherever he can. Don’t be surprised if he sends you a dick pic. They love to flash their dicks and get off on the element of surprise.

5.      The Frenemy Dmer

Normally they’re women because men aren’t as good at the 2 facedness. The reason they’re DMing you instead of posting or responding to your posts is because they’ve slagged you off to so many people they can’t publicly acknowledge the friendship anymore. Probably best to eventually block these ones as their fuckery is deep and their just here for the tea, awaiting your downfall.

6.      The Scavenger Dmer

They are broke. They’ll probably start with faux concern about you and how you’re doing. Then they will tell you about their issues. You make those noises of sympathy and before you know it they’re telling you about their financial woes and how unfair the government are to their particular work demographic. Real friends are different but these are people you barely converse with!  My view, stay woke and hip to the game. Let them stay broke.

Any others I’ve missed?

© Chelsea Black 2020 (The Rona Era)


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