Back at work and I’d just sat down with my Monday morning feast of cottage pie, chips and beans. Yes, I know that’s double potato but the way Maxine Budda Belly works she’s comfortable with Double Carbs. Like Rice and Potatoes. Or Plantain with anything else Like 80s double denim it’s not right, but it’s ok. Anyway, I digress. The point is t hat I was in my happy work zone i.e. lunchtime.
I’d just sat down when I looked up to see the sexiest looking man ever coming towards me. Ok maybe not the sexiest but this has been a dry Monday. His lips are a tad thin and his hair …..anyway he was smiling at me. I think. So I did the turn around to check if he was smiling at someone else and, yep, he was smiling at his colleague seated at the table behind me. Yeah, it’s not one of those happily ever after tales.
He was wearing a blue, tight shirt, neck 17 I’d say at a guess and, my goodness was he Hench! The shirt fit him like the 1998 Italian football teams’ shirts. Perfectly! He was just the right side of Incredible Hulk Hench and I never, ever do Hench. As he moved his chair to sit down I caught a glimpse of those butt and thigh muscles and….well I can confirm that someone hasn’t been skipping their leg days at t’gym. He was Hench all over.
And so it began. The day dreams of us meeting for lunch and laughing over our usual choices. I’d be myself and still get the double carbs whilst he would gently berate me for not watching what I eat as he munched on pure protein and cold limp salady crap. Opposites can attract!
Initially it would be perfect but as winter set in and I more regularly reached for the chocolate sponges with chocolate sauce and the apple pies with custard his berating would become less gentle and his eyes would start to wonder to the salad cart and the thigh gapped lovelies that surround it. I in turn would sabotage his gym efforts by pathetically begging that he stay in and watch First Dates with me. See how quickly we progressed to watching TV together? Yep this would be the real thing.
So, as he leafed his limpy leafy food and I gleefully ate my double carbs I realised that I wasn’t ready for such compromise in my life and, the crush died out. How would this work? I was addicted to romances and he, clearly had a relationship with Fitness First. And those trousers and shirts would need ironing and I’m really not the one. Why can’t he favour clothes with lots of wrinkle resistant lycra like me?
Yep, I’m over him. But, for 30 minutes, what we had was real and I’ll never forget it.Well I will forget it but, it was still real, in my head. Now leave me alone. I’ve got to check on that chocolate sponge cake. Who knows, maybe I’ll meet my match in the dessert section.
©Chelsea Black 2015