The Dreaded ex ( no, not that one. The other, other, other, other, other one )

So as I was prepping for a meeting when I had a return of the ex (again) moment. This ex sent me a message on Facebook. I didn’t even recognise the name as he thinks he can still make it as a rapper as he fast approaches 50 (stage age still 36) so uses different monikers. I dunno why I ever thought this dude was cute. That’s on me. I can’t even remember any of his lyrics. Damn you alcohol.

I know he’s creeping because it’s a new year and he knows I like to celebrate a Chinese new year.  I haven’t heard from him in more than 5 years and the last time I told him to lose my number. (I think my actual words were, fuck you, fuck flat arse (he was seeing someone with strong white genes) and fuck your life. Don’t call me, ever!) Clearly this wasn’t enough.

Nah! The way I hate that shit. More  than 5 years later and he knows that a) he’s not got my number and ii) even if he did find it he’s blocked and 3) I can’t stand his nonsense arse so even if he calls from another number I am likely to hang up .

Let’s go back

His crimes are simple: He lied, left, then tried to pretend we could still be friends. He also only discovered gym after we were together. I had to put up with wheezing sex and overly sweaty pillows. Lack of stamina should be criminal.

The main issue is that he wasn’t happy in his life. I was totally happy in mine so, he chose to try and make mine miserable so that we could stay together forever. He quickly realised that cheating was the best way to piss me off and petty catching him, worse.

So er, yeah. I’m not his biggest fan.

And back to the present

Now he’s all. Hey! Let’s talk business. Why? How? Again, why? I don’t understand how you think we can be partners in anything when you are a liar and a cheat. It’s not going to work.

Yes I’m curious as to what half brained scheme he’s managed to come up with but, whatever it is will probably fail. Like his rap career he can’t see things through properly. He’s also put the weight back on. He remembers who was there for him when he was plump last time and figures she will be there again. Well she’s not! She’s busy doing anything other than you Fam. Well, I will be after writing this blog and eating snacks. Priorities

And Block! Facebook is a lot of upkeep I tell you. Like a whole job by itself.

And P.S. Dudes, the business line doesn’t work when you’ve not got any money. Just another smokey idea without execution. Nope. Nah. Not me. Not the one.

Happy new year ALL

© Chelsea Black 2019