November 5, 2012 by

Single Boring Female

4 comments

Categories: BLOG, Latest, Randoms, Tags: , ,

Single Boring Female.

This is a rant. I know I lament about the men a lot but I do talk about other things in my REAL life.

To all of those single black women who only go to events to find a man….please, stop. You’re no fun. You can’t relax and enjoy yourself because you’re worried about not looking wifey for all of 5 seconds and ….you’re just miserable looking. You’re draining and I am not the ideal friend for you. Sisterhood does not exist for these women.

I throw events all the time and I can spot a SBF straight away. They ask stupid questions like ‘how come you know so many men?’ and lament about how there are so few good men out there. That’s because the good men stay away from toxic women like you.

No one wants to get with the boring chick in her 30s. It doesn’t bode well for them. Stop looking at men like you are measuring them for wedding suits. Most men aren’t bright but even they can see it.

I’ve suddenly realised that as many of my friends form relationships and go become mommies and me a god mommy that they are replaced by SBFs. Single Boring Females are constantly looking for an in. They come empty handed and don’t have many interests apart from acquiring a man.

So how do you qualify if they are an SBF and to be avoided.

1)      Her behaviour changes the minute a man enters the room

2)      She honestly doesn’t know why she is single and the chubby chick in the corner is married

3)      She has a list for the perfect man although she has never met him

4)      She acts like the perfect woman despite masking a head full of broken biscuits

5)      She always asks who is going to be at an event and when there asks where are all the men

6)      She is pretty yes maybe but hasn’t realised that she isn’t 23 anymore so still acts like a woman who expects men to make ALL the effort

7)      She never invites you out to anything. She only calls to find out what you’ve arranged

8)      She never introduces any men to the mix. Any man she knows is a potential back up for herself

9)      She’ll disappear the minutes she’s in a relationship and only start calling when they’re problems

10)

So beware of the Single Boring Female. They’ll bore a man into submission yes but don’t let that be you

© Chelsea Black

Chelsea Black is a writer. Romantically seeking her Fubo (future boyfriend) she often gets distracted by misadventures. She is currently working on her second book, first baby (sperm to be confirmed) and first real career. Chocolate and cocktails are food groups

4 Responses to Single Boring Female

  1. Lois

    Please don’t get me started on these ones…full of “broken biscuits” indeed. I’m an SF but as soon as the B gets added to the mix you have permission to pinch me….HARD!

    • chelseablack Post author

      You have permission to do the same. Like I say I get the odd day of self pity when it’s cold and you want a hug or something heavy lifted but seriously some make it their raison d’etre

  2. Lindsay Wesker

    Hear hear! There are a lot of single women who bring NOTHING to the party! Men want the whole package (a great mother and homemaker, a cook in the kitchen, a lady in public, a whore in the bedroom, someone with brains, confidence and ambition) but many single women fall WELL SHORT in one or more departments.

    • chelseablack Post author

      I’m not too worried about the homemaker / parent / cook bit as those are relationship based values that most grow into and doesn’t say much to me about the individual. But yes you want someone who is whole before they become a partner. Not looking to fill a void via a relationship

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