March 19, 2012 by

Don’t covet thy neighbour’s man

4 comments

Categories: A-sexy: Etiquette Guide, DATING TIPS, Latest, Misadventures

A-Sexy: C is for covet

In a previous piece called the Role of the Confidente we discussed the sorts of questions we women have to put up with when you men aren’t behaving as expecting. It’s not easy. You know how us women tend to share everything from our anxieties to our plans to burn his house down (I bet Chilli and T-Boz knew about that fire).

But there is one thing you mustn’t ever share. And that’s great sexual performances, a man you desire beyond a shag or a man who treats you right. If your man is great in bed keep it to yourself. If he treats you like a queen, keep it to yourself. Just shrug and say I do alright cos otherwise she may covet your man. Especially if she is with one she knows she’s settling ‘down’ for.

I had a confidente whom I told these things too. It was a strange relationship built on the fact that I needed someone to drag around London on my many excursions last minute. She was game as she didn’t have many friends. But then I met the one or Theo Neman = The One Man for me. This Theo I thought was the one….6 ones ago. Yeah I know, there have been a lot of them but the next one my precious, he’s the one! Lucky number 7?

I told her about our conversations and she encouraged me all the way. And when we spoke …it was wow. We hung for a great few weeks.

Then he disappeared for years. I couldn’t understand it. Surely it was meant to be? But no, apparently not. I poured my heart out to said friend and she was all awwwww men are bastards let’s set his house on fire but….. we didn’t know where he lived. Besides, she had a terrible weave and you’re never sure which way the backdraft will go.

And then I bumped into him some years later. Eventually he told me that my friend had said that I wasn’t that into him, was seeing someone else and then tried to sleep with him herself. I didn’t even know they were friends but apparently she used to call him for a chat. This I would normally have disregarded as slanderous but this was the same friend who had actually disappeared into the sunset with another Theo. My Theo 5 ones ago.

So be warned. Your so called friend is not to be trusted with such information if she is single. Forget what the bible says. It’s not just your shoes that women may covet.

© Chelsea Black

Chelsea Black is a writer. Romantically seeking her Fubo (future boyfriend) she often gets distracted by misadventures. She is currently working on her second book, first baby (sperm to be confirmed) and first real career. Chocolate and cocktails are food groups

4 Responses to Don’t covet thy neighbour’s man

  1. IceQueen

    Most women unfortunately will come across a woman like this in their lifetime….the type who is always competitive with you, quite possessive over you and doesn’t like it when you have other friends etc. Its quite sad really!

    • chelseablack Post author

      Urgh! The possessive friend is worse because it makes it look like you’re being the mean one by not wanting to be with her. I’ve had these and it’s led to situations with one put my life in danger. Lesson learned. Women can be evil

  2. Coolty

    That bitch, lol
    [ for some reason this story resonates… ]

    A one up, from the other side of the table, is to not let your lady hang around men who are talking about how to please women. They are likely to think about how much of those things you have done, have not done and will not do. I think that we know where this is going…

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