A-Sexy: B is for Bucket fanny

So whenever you announce that you are a size queen men (usually the insecure ones I must admit) regale you with tales of bucket fannies. Now I’ve done my research and the average woman’s vagaina length is 3 inches long and won’t stretch beyond an inch beyond that sans child birth. So for her to be stretched to the point where your Prince Hakeem is flapping around in there suggests that either you are small or that she should be on Embarrassing Bodies.

As the chances are she isn’t shying away from sex assume she is normal and that  the issue is with you.  Stop with the bucket fanny stories. My small mouth yawns at your attempts to make women feel insecure. It won’t work. We all do out muscle exercises over our morning cereal.  So there is a hole in your bucket excuse.

In the unlikely event that this is your life partner and she has auditioned for Embarrassing Bodies then yes, do seek medical help. But I swear these are the same guys who are always trying to convince you that anal is the holy grail. Hmmmmm. I guess like everyone else they too just want to feel the sides. Bless

Oh and ladies if he breaks your heart is not ok to go around telling everyone he has a small dick. Why were you with him for 3 years. Come on!

That is all 😛

© Chelsea