Categotry Archives: DATING TIPS

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4 Tips For Single Women On Valentine’s Day

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Categories: BLOG, DATING TIPS, Latest

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For women in relationships, Valentine’s Day expectations and lists were set in advance  - you’ll have a date with your partner, and perhaps exchange some romantic gifts. But for us single women, Valentine’s Day means dealing with people asking you what you’re doing on Valentine’s day and when you say nothing they give you that look. You know the one. Yes THAT look!

As you all know the last few Valentines Day celebrations have been cursed so this year, this year I decided to do it differently. It’s always harder to find gifts for the single chick. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to treat yourself to a beautiful and enjoyable celebration, with or without a guy in your life. Here are four tips for fun ways to spend Valentine’s Day as a single lass.

  1. Treat Yourself

Valentine’s Day is a day on which people often expect presents, but there’s no shame in simply treating yourself either! Whether that means buying some flowers to have around the house, picking out some decadent chocolates, or even treating yourself to a favourite meal, Valentine’s Day means why not indulge. There’s no rule that says you have to be in a relationship to be treated like a princess on this romantic holiday – you can treat yourself that way any time you want!

2. Send Out Gifts

You can also get into the giving spirit and spread some love by sending out gifts on Valentine’s Day. It’s easy enough – just order a few appropriate items from M&S and you’re all set! Maybe don’t send to your crushes but to friends or family. Whatever the case, there’s certainly nothing wrong with showing a bit of love for friends and family on Valentine’s Day. We all love flowers. Especially when they’re not apology / guilt flowers.

3. Hang Out With The Girls

I’m not one for staying at home and sulking at being alone this year. So instead I’ve invited my other single friends for a dress up dinner and drinks night. That dress shouldn’t be hidden at the back of your wardrobe. Drag it out and give it a twirl!  In fact, you’ll probably even have more fun than a lot of your friends who are on dates will, but don’t tell them that! Hmmmm, I’ve just checked and none have RSVPed. Still holding out for that date huh my precious?

4. Watch A Romantic Film

As you well know I’m addicted to Rom Coms. Many of which aren’t that good but Valentine’s Day is the perfect day for a classic rom com. So for those devotees to romance without having an actual date, there’s certainly some appeal to watching a romantic film or two. Pick a film with a lighter, funnier side – Love Actually, for instance – and it can be oddly comforting and enjoyable on a day filled with love and romance. Alternatively hit my 2 part list of 14 romantic movies.

Don’t say I don’t love ya!

© Chelsea Black

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The Facebook photo CV

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Categories: BLOG, DATING TIPS, Latest, Tags: , ,

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The Facebook Photo CV

Remember when internet dating was a little bit dirty. I mean it was a sordid secret. You would meet couples and ask how they met and neither one of them could look you in the eye? Those were the good old days! But now, it’s part of anyone who is looking to date’s portfolio. We’ve moved it up a notch and stopped paying for the privilege. Yes I’m talking about Facebook.

OK so now we are recruiting potentials  through Facebook I’m going to have to warn you as to what your profile is saying to the world. Read through and if any of these resonate fix it and spare yourself some disappointment. I’m not saying that this is the reason these assumptions are made but like all recruiters we only have a few seconds to reach a conclusion as to the worthiness of the application.

Photos

1)      Guys who peaked in the 90s. Hairstyles like the hightop lean or Soul glo fabulosity. Take down all said photos and instead post up pictures of Obama, superheros and philosophical quotes like “when a man really loves , he does something average but gets huge points for it.” It adds an air of mystery to you and shows that you know your market.

2)      Rule of thumb, if her kid looks 5 years younger than her than something isn’t right. Don’t wander off into a mother daughter porno fantasy love. Someone is lying about their age.

3)      Photos of only their face tell you that chances are they’re not that body beautiful or confident. I would keep scrolling but they may be hiding something you probably don’t want to see.  I had one of these and he was…well let’s just say I assembled my bed myself and I’m not that confident that it could take him let alone both of us.

4)      Photos of him and the boys then chances are you are going to have to contend with posse time. Oh wait we aren’t calling it posse anymore? Then stop hanging around with your high school posse every weekend when you’re  40 something dude.

5)      Only business networking type photos? That’s the only time he looks good girl is in a suit.

6)      No photos of the opposite sex? They are hiding someone away. Maybe it’s like that time LL Cool J used a slimmer woman on his doing it and doing it and doing it well song instead of the real artist. He may be ashamed of her indoors.

7)      If a guy only has women in his photos then grab your purse and run. He’s one of those timewasting wannabes.

8)      One woman in his photos – not quite over the ex. One man in her photos, seriously chica you met Idris once! Let’s move on.

9)      Drunken photos posted by others? Her friends aren’t true friends. Beware the bitchy singles

10)   Drunken photos posted by themselves. So what they like to get drunk.

11)   Only drunken photos…functioning alcoholism is what keeps the supermarkets in profit.

12)   Photos with their kids. They’ve got kids. This may have been the only achievement they are proud of to date. Also telling you that they give cute babies. Always an angle.

13)   Photos of them half naked. Don’t hate, appreciate that Fitness First membership.

14)   Only photos of them half naked. Yeah this one is going to spend a lot of time in the mirror or posing during sex. Best you leave them to their greatest love of all. Themselves.

15)   Photos of Food. Unless they are dieting or experimenting with new recipes this could suggest a healthy appetite for sex. See 3 to ensure that the body doesn’t reflect over eating.

16)   Never smiling – takes themselves too seriously

17)   Always smiling – they know how to have a laugh

18)   Messy rooms – they are messy

19)   Sterile room – they remembered to clean up before the photo was taken

20)   Only photos of uplifting inspirational quotes from others? A wanker with very little imagination.

Happy recruiting!

© Chelsea Black

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the marriage debate

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Categories: BLOG, DATING TIPS, Latest, Randoms, Tags: , , ,

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So I’ve figured it out. It’s only taken me 30 years – yeah I’m 30 this week. Who knows what age I will be next week. Anyway I digress. Back in the olden days marriage was a great business arrangement between the middle and upper classes and financial survival for those that weren’t. Good times. Love was accidental and a privilege of a few.  They write about rare historical romances a lot.

Then, and I didn’t do history at GCSE but, I think there came a point where it was decided that marriage should be for love. I blame Hollywood.  This coincided with women not letting men have sex unless they married them.

Then came the biggest betrayal ever. These women got married and soon after stopped having sex with their husbands. I mean she had bartered her body for security so why did she have to keep putting up with the sex now that she had the ring. This was clearly before the Joys of Sex VHS / Beta Max videos were made.

Porn helped to relieve the tensions of husbands everywhere but to be honest, if I was a man who had been duped into marriage then given less sex than I had been getting before I would be royally pissed too! Yes women started working and contributing to the household but seriously? No sex?

And so to modern times when anyone can get sex from anyone, anywhere with very little bartering involved. You’ve got to love the internet.  A few glasses of something half way decent and a meal that isn’t fast food and most guys are a shoe in. Of course they can’t say anything too stupid and they have to pretend that eventually they too will want to settle down and have sex.  I mean kids!

So here is my question. Why would any man want to get married? Why would he give up his freedom and financial earnings? I don’t get it. Sperm is the one thing that we need a man for as the sperm bank won’t give out photos in this country.

As I watched yet another painful episode of Don’t Tell the Bride I got it. I don’t actually want a marriage either. I just want a wedding and a father for the sprogs whose photo I’ve seen. Reality bites. Marriage in and of itself can be quite redundant if not for business.

So my view on marriage has really changed since my last marriage. It’s not a bitter response to a divorce. Instead an acknowledgement that marriage in and of itself isn’t the commitment we women think it is. The number of married men I’ve inadvertently slept with well, I know how many of them aren’t getting enough sex at home. I see that some women see it as the final tick box in their life journey but seriously, it’s the beginning of the end for most as many become a clone of the institution and lose their fabulosity.

So here’s to alternative lifestyles and looking at life as an individual journey. Let’s move beyond this era where women try to trick men into marriage and yet don’t have a real reason to get married. Marry for love, sure, marry for children if you feel that is the way but don’t marry because you think that you need to do so to be a complete woman.

I’m off to look at cats

© Chelsea Black

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