June 8, 2012 by

Authors bootcamp day 1

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A hard sell – the authors bootcamp day 1

So today was the first of 3 days at a publishing conference for writers. It was called the millionaire bootcamp which should have been a clue but somehow I missed it.  I’ve been looking forward to it despite the book sales soaring so far. (I’ve sold 4, and I know them all).

Off I went and I had a problem with the temperature of the room straight away. Trying to keep everyone awake is one thing but people please, when the man from Canada was complaining that it was too cold and had to put his jacket on then clearly it’s not just me.

Then the first speaker came on.

Who wants to make lots of money from their book? Say YEAH!!! That’s not loud enough, let me hear you at the back! Say whoooo! Come on up onto the stage and dance. YEAH!!

All this from a woman who looked like an Eastender’s extra? What the fuck had I signed up for?

And then it hit me. This was a watered down Americanised sales conference for internet marketing and I hadn’t read between the lines. No one talked about the writing itself or the pros of publishing in different ways. Instead everyone was an expert on nothing very much but they had written a book about it? Their expertise was getting people to go on courses or webinars that they could ill afford. And I was mean to be excited the speakers reduced their courses valued at anything from £73K to £13K to ….the coincidental price of £4997?

Yeah, I’ve been here before. I still have the untouched DVDS under my bed somewhere. I was about to have a snigger with the person next to me who had seemed just as jaded but he had his arm up to give me a hi five as directed by the person on stage. Not you too my Scottish friend.

The problem with these courses or conferences is that the people who attend really need help. They want it so bad that they are willing to go up on a rickety stage and dance to 2 Unlimited “there’s no limit” despite clearly not having danced since the last family wedding. The speakers could be doing good. It hit me that the only millionaires would be the ones on the stage as they told us we only have 7 minutes left to buy this amazing one time offer. I can’t. It’s cruelty. If you believe in your product that much then surely don’t pressure people into buying.

But I will go back and finish because it has given me some tips about what I need to do to get my book out there. But I’m not buying anything. My bank mananager wouldn’t see £5K as an investment. And if I hear them mention Tony Robbins one more time….pray for me my precious, 2 more days of this crap. And if you hear me whoop you can slap me.

© Chelsea Black

 

Chelsea Black is a writer. Romantically seeking her Fubo (future boyfriend) she often gets distracted by misadventures. She is currently working on her second book, first baby (sperm to be confirmed) and first real career. Chocolate and cocktails are food groups

2 Responses to Authors bootcamp day 1

  1. Jo Michaels

    Oh wow. If we were both in that room… And then what? The speakers would be begging for mercy, that’s what! Ha! I am as outspoken as they come when I feel someone has wronged me. Those millionaires would have had the wrath of the Khans morphed into women to deal with. No. We will NOT take your B.S. sitting down! We want some REAL information! 🙂 Sorry to hear you aren’t having a blast, dear. But, chin up and WRITE ON!

    • chelseablack Post author

      I think I’m annoyed at an internet marketing conference disguised as something for authors that would actually be useful. I will not be spending money to make these people rich as they rip me off.

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