Apartment 58

OK so my friend invited me to this champagne event at a new private members club and suddenly I remembered that I had always wanted to join one. I just haven’t found the right one for me. I’m not fussy (read as I’m fussy) but at the same time I’m not corporate enough for some and not creative enough for others. I’m that rare breed of a creative with a type A personality. I love a plan be it dating, work or even travel. Let’s get rid of this need to seem fun and spontaneous. Tell me what we are doing so I can dress appropriately folks.

But, back to the club. The concept is a cool one. Your home space in the middle of Soho. Bring your laptop or not, friends or clients and just hang or get work done. I’ve got to love it. I’m constantly in between meetings and coffees with nowhere to go. My Balans card has come in handy but this was exactly what I needed. They’re opening ones in Shoreditch and Notting Hill so there is growth and right now it’s affordable. I don’t think this will last for long.

The first clue that it may not have been my cup of chai was that it was attached to a Japanese restaurant. I’m not a fan of sushi at the best of times but when I asked for a menu and there were no chips on there I just felt myself sink. So I’m meant to spend time in a place where I don’t like the food? I thought it was cute that you ordered on an ipad but I wasn’t impressed with the limited cooked choices. I am African! I need my meat and starch to feel like I’ve eaten properly. Luckily you’re in Soho so you could nip out and get more options but seriously, why should you? I would be that member that others complain about who brings their own Nandos.

I can’t really comment on the members as there was no sense of congruity to the mix this being an event. The owners popped in casually and spoke to a few people (not me!) so there is a sense of intimacy without being too intrusive. I also don’t have a view on the decor except it seemed a little too 50s communist furnishings in places. I had flashbacks of bad Russian porn. But everyone else seemed to love it. OK, so I do have a view.

Free champers is always a plus and I’m told that the cocktails were delicious but I opted for the food. It was nice but when I was overcharged for the pleasure, less so. Quickly sorted we left and I was ambivalent because the other thing was…..I was freezing! Air con during the day I get but it was 9 O’Clock at night and I had my pashmina on? This was nothing like my home. British Gas and I both know how hot I like it.

I love the concept yes but the Soho one could never be the one for me. I will wait and see what the other two are like. In particular I would want to see what was going on with the room temperature and the food. What’s the point in me being in a place where I DON’T want to eat or I have to wear my coat?

So now I’m going to have to check out a few others because I’ve got the need to find the club that screams me. Within my budget this may just end up being me in the spare room instead of the lounge?

Happy private club hunting!

© Chelsea Black

Chelsea Black is a writer. Romantically seeking her Fubo (future boyfriend) she often gets distracted by misadventures. She is currently working on her second book, first baby (sperm to be confirmed) and first real career. Chocolate and cocktails are food groups