ditch

As it’s still technically the first week of the new year I’m allowed. Now, every year is going to be THE year in a singletinis calendar. And that’s not inaccurate as every year is a year closer to meeting someone you can tolerate for more than 5 days of a week. I can’t tolerate most of my colleagues so any man I deem worthy of seeing every day is a special man indeed.  (To Be Determined)

But whilst you may rely on fate to bring your soulmate to you there are some practical tools you can use too. I know some of these will be radical for some of you but, let’s give it a go.

1)      Ditch the online dating sites .
Go out and actually meet new people without having a prefilled checklist. This is because men (and increase numbers of women) lie about everything on there. Of course I’m going to put that I like wine and travel even though by travel I mean that I cross London and the only wine I know is Champagne. Don’t assume that you know the person just because they’ve filled out a profile. I’ve filled out profiles for friends and they’re nothing like the way I make them sound.
2)      Ditch the apps.
Get a hobby. I don’t trust anything which only asks you to swipe to engage. It’s too accessible and cheap which means, increased number of creeps and married guys on there. You have been warned.
3)      Ditch the whining.
Yes, it’s harder to date in the internet age where men have way too much choice but you don’t want to be that bad first date that only talks about how bad the dating scene is. Of course it’s bad. This is guerrilla warfare time. The fight requires stealth and cunning.
4)      Ditch the diet.
I can’t with dating and dieting. No man understands your food intolerances straight away. So order that one thing that you can eat and don’t explain how your acid reflux and your IBS fight each other and you end up with trapped wind and terrible stomach cramps.  Apparently this isn’t sexy.
5)      Ditch the frenemies.  

I know it’s hard to go out there by yourself and mingle. But, dragging along that one bitter friend who is more likely to block than wing woman is not the one. Yes, I get it, all of your close friends are married or with their kids so can’t rave hard with you anymore. It’s an effing pain but, if you don’t trust her with your chocolate stash don’t trust her with a man who isn’t yours yet. wish

I’m going to try these with you and let’s see how we get on. Only 40 days to Valentine’s Day so, here’s hoping things pick up x  

© Chelsea Black 2016

Chelsea Black is a writer. Romantically seeking her Fubo (future boyfriend) she often gets distracted by misadventures. She is currently working on her second book, first baby (sperm to be confirmed) and first real career. Chocolate and cocktails are food groups